Sunday, March 20, 2011

The Day everything turned green! (or how to outdrink an Irishman)

So, back to the "Bucket List" I might add that I have never (ever) been drunk (shit-faced) in my life after 34 years. I have always been a Soda guy over Beer and I am totally ignorant when it comes to Wine or Hard Liquor, but.....St Patrick was around the corner and why not make this one of the things on my Bucket List. To go out and drink (or outdrink) an Irishman on St Patrick's.

I got the call the day before St Paddy's from my friend "J" just to confirm a promise I had made to him last year and I had forgotten all about it.
- So, what's up man? are you gonna back out on me?
- Errr, no...are you?
- No, I finish at 4, can you meet at 4?
- I finish at 5 but let me see what I can do....
- What? are you some kind of pussy? You'd boss won't let you?
- Errrrrr, I'll see you at 4!

You can't call chicken a man with a bucket list, hahaha, I gather some people and went to have 2 pitchers of "green beer" at a pub nearby and came back to finish my 3 hours in the afternoon, happier, with a big grin and more was on!

At 4 I left to meet my friend and brought my own backup from Venezuela (my friend "A")  and headed to King and Yonge, where we had a Hero Burger (now I know why the name, you become a fucking Hero after you eat one of those, nasty tasting burger, I'd never eat there again) and we headed to PJ O'Brians. Line up and we waited for almost 45 minutes and the line didn't move an inch. Plus other cute girls were skipping the line and meeting friends before us and making our chances to get in closer to none.

"Fuck this!" - J said, "Let's go closer to were I live, there's an Irish Bar there and no line-up"
Let's Do It!

And that's how we got to meet "Galway Arms Bar and Restaurant" the bar packed with at least 100 irish or irish descendent and 2 venezuelans..

We started with a round of Guinness (we were 5 now including J's wife and her cousin K) I must add this was my first Guinness Beer ever and after the first sip I doubt that I could have more than one. Very thick and strong. (remember I am the coke guy...right, so even coffee tastes strong to me)

We got onto the second round thanks to the girls, and by this time the bar was getting packed and the music was about to begin, 2 guys on acoustic guitars playing Irish tunes. Joke of the night: "So, is this your first Guinness ever?", No J, this is my second one! at least 3 people laugh...

The third round was on me, so I got to the bar and asked the bartender:
- "What's the name of that drink on the movies where you drop a shot in the beer and drink it fast?"
- "The Irish-Car-Bomb"
- "The what?"
- "The Irish-Car-Bomb!"
- "What's in it?"
- "Guinness+Bailey's+Irish Scotch"
- "Perfect! Gimme 5 of those puppies"

Came back and I must proudly say not even my irish friend knew what the fuck that was, so I didn't feel as much as a "drunk virgin" anymore. We did them (except for the girls, you know how the say women are smarter than men...there you go)

I swear the moment I finished drinking it I felt like I have woken up. If the 4 previous beers I have had got me tipsy this one was the cure, killed the effect and got me sober, I even told "A"

- Dude! I am perfect, nothing happened
- Yeah, give it 5 minutes....

Done! 5 minutes after everything went in slow motion and my smile was bigger than the cheshire cat.

After that 2 more rounds of Guinness and I was dancing and hitting on "K" cousin and toasting my glass with every single girl it passed by, I even was practicing my "Irish" accent and passed by "J" older brother that just came from Ireland last year's, ohhh mannnn. Good thing we were in Canada and not Ireland

- "We're in Ireland are you from lad?"
- "Caracas"
- "Fuckin' Eejit"
(and that's how the fight would have

11:55pm and like Cinderella I needed to split before I turned from Irish back to Venezuelan. I checked the bus times and got the last round of Irish-Car-Bombs (3 this time) got them really quick and grabbed my stuff and left for the bus stop.

I slept every single inch of the way back home and I had to take Bus-Subway-Bus and walk about 5-6 blocks to get to my bed. I was aware but funny. Got home, went to take a piss, got back to my  room, took of my jacket and fell on the bed! Next day the alarm woke me up at 6:30am....ohhhhh did I mention all this was done on a thursday? and that I had to go to work the next morning? ok now you know.

I enjoyed my hangover, got drunk the night before, didn't do any stupid thing I'd regret the morning after.

I worked out ok! So I can scratch that thing from my Bucket List "Outdrinked an Irishman"

Next thing on the BL, go see my parents...I booked a quick flight to Venezuela to go there for my dad's 70th birthday. I'll be visiting family and friends for 10 days and then coming back. Looking forward to it.

Probably on my next post!

That's it for St Paddy's my dear followers....I leave you with the Pogues and "If I should Fall from Grace from God"


  1. Great blog ! Great of my favorite in fact.

  2. jejejeje estoy picada porque nunca te rascaste bebiendo conmigo y ahora tú empiezas una nueva vida con la bebida con el alcohol incluido y yo tengo una vida de peasoff... quizás en tu BL haya drogas? a ver si me incluyes en la experiencia! bechos guapo! y disfruta el viejecillo